🏊 🌒#519: Black swim cancelled, ChatGPT in Berlin, eclipse eye pain

Nobody is even thinking about building The Wall

Aug 14, 2026

Me and Hubertus are just to the left. Grainy concert footage by Heipl Berlin.

Hey 20 Percent,

I got my official election materials from Berlin Thursday and after being annoyed that what could have just been an email was a letter AND an envelope, I enjoyed the moment as a new German.

I thought I had already decided how I was going to vote but then some friends invited us to a concert at Wühlheide Thursday night. I was watching the opening band when I realized Hubertus Heil (SPD) was sitting next to me.

Heil’s been a parliamentarian since 1998, coincidentally the year I accidentally emigrated to Germany, and was labor minister in the ill-fated traffic light coalition under Chancellor Olaf Scholz (SPD).

The traffic-light coalition that reformed immigration laws and made it possible for me to become German and keep my American passport. Ergo, to become German.

We chatted some and I thanked him and he couldn’t have been more nice, and I started wondering if I owed the SPD a vote for enabling my German-ness. Do I?

Now I don’t know how I’ll vote. Have a good weekend — it’s supposed to be hot.

Andrew

Even swimming is a problem now

Racist comments and threats led the Volksbühne to cancel a joint event planned for Friday with the Each One Teach One association (Eoto) that would have opened the theater’s Volksbad pool only for young Black swimmers from 12pm to 6pm Friday, according to RBB24. The Volksbühne and Eoto said they couldn’t guarantee the safety of the swimmers, even with the assistance of the police, following the threats. Right-wing German media latched onto the event as racist since the pool would only be open to Black swimmers although the event was private. The pool was already closed most of the week because the showers were broken. Eoto says it is “a community-based education and empowerment organization, as well as a place of learning and encounter, for people of African descent.” How can right-wing idiots get such a great event cancelled?

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Germans call it either “Chatty” or just “Chat”

Are you looking for a job because you were replaced by AI? ChatGPT creator OpenAI will open a second German office in Berlin “relatively soon”, CEO Sam Altman said during an interview with financial daily Handelsblatt. Germany is OpenAI’s biggest European market for paid subscriptions and is one of its three largest markets. The company only has an office in Munich. Altman said talks with Chancellor Friedrich Merz (CDU) and finance minister Lars Klingbeil (SPD) about opening a data center have proven unfruitful.

Is BVG … improving?

Public transport provider BVG has become more reliable and is reviving at least one mothballed bus line, according to Tagesspiegel. Reliability by subways — how many trains ran as planned — rose to 98.5% in the first half of the year from 94.3% last year and 91.7% in 2024. Trams improved to 99.3% from 98.6% while buses bumped up 0.1 percentage points to 99.6%. But the services experienced delays at the same level as last year. BVG will also reintroduce the 310 bus in Charlottenburg and extend the M77 bus in Marienfelde. The frequency of X33 from Spandau will also be increased, the first improvement in bus service since 2023.

Eclipsed

Charité hospital treated 10 eye patients and the eye emergency room in Marzahn saw 29 patients with eye complaints after staring directly at Wednesday’s eclipse, even though each and every media outlet warned against doing just that, according to Tagesspiegel. The Vivantes hospital in Neukölln treated another 10. Most, the paper noted, were under 35. Minor burns to the retina can heal but severe burns are permanent and can affect eyesight. Police also had to be called to the Planetarium in Prenzlauer Berg Wednesday after 3,000 people queued up in hopes of getting a free pair of glasses to watch the eclipse and some grew impatient.

🍺 🥨 Germany-wide news 🥨 🍺

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Factoid

Construction on the Berlin Wall began unexpectedly on Aug. 13, 1961 — 65 years ago. East German leader Walter Ulbricht telegraphed the construction during a press conference on June 15 of that same year when asked if East Germany planned to create a border with West Germany at Brandenburg Gate. “Nobody is planning on building a wall,” Ulbricht said. The West German journalist had asked him about a border, not a barrier, and his denial is now seen as prophetic.