#289: Michael Jackson in Mauerpark, Cocaine cop, Brandenburg Uber loophole
Lots of reader mail because we love reader mail
Hey 20 Percent,
I’ve started gathering my items to apply for German citizenship and had to laugh at the citizenship test — just putting up with the bureaucracy involved with applying is test enough.
But I’m also reminded of this thing my brain does — it loves getting away with things, which got me in trouble in my early days in Germany. I would intentionally forget to bring one item to a meeting at the Bürgeramt just to see if they noticed.
They always noticed. And I always had to make a new appointment — and I didn’t get away with anything.
After the third time it happened, I had a chat with my brain and developed a new strategy — from then on I would bring far too much to the meetings. Not just everything required, but also all the supporting evidence. Instead of one Ordner (binder), I’d bring three.
And an amazing thing happened. The Beamter would say, “Did you also bring the … oh I can tell by the stack that you have everything. I don’t need to see anything else.” And suddenly, by playing their game, I was getting away with something.
My brain rejoiced.
But now that everything’s digital there’s no way to get away with anything. I just have to play their game. My brain is bored.
May your weekend be more exciting!
Andrew
PS: Thanks to everyone who came out to the News Quiz on Wednesday — it was great, as always. We’re taking a summer break until September. If you’d like to support this newsletter, please consider upgrading to a paid subscription, buying a mug or contributing on Patreon. And visitor this issue’s sponsor: Ironhack.
Bad Uber drivers using Brandenburg loophole
I may no longer be able to beat German bureaucracy but Berlin’s crooks can. Illicit ride-sharing drivers have begun registering their cars in neighboring Brandenburg after authorities forced companies like Uber and Bolt to kick out about 1,600 unlicensed drivers in Berlin, according to RBB24. The unlicensed drivers with Brandenburg registrations can then again drive here, much to the chagrin of legal drivers who have enjoyed a 20% jump in prices since the cull. Riders are now also having to wait 50% to 70% longer for a ride.
Coke cop cops fine
And this item is getting away with something while not getting away with it — a Berlin police officer was fined €6,000 for posessing 6.5 grams of cocaine found in a safe at her home during a raid, according to Tagesspiegel. She said an unnamed friend — possibly also a cop — left the powder at her place after a party. However, police first began investigating the officer after she ordered a subordinate to leave a 2.3 kilo block of coke in her office instead of checking it into evidence. She still has her job but is on reduced hours and is facing a disciplinary hearing. She avoided charges of pocketing evidence for lack of … evidence.
TU President refuses to resign for liking tweets
This is just news, not part of the getting-away-with-something theme: The president of the Technical University refused to resign after days of controversy because she liked tweets about the Israel-Hamas war calling for a ceasefire but that also included swastikas and other questionable symbols, according to taz. An oversight committee at the university voted 13-12 to recommend she resign but failed to get a two-thirds majority to call for her dismissal. The president, Geraldine Rauch, apologized and said a self-called disciplinary hearing will yield legally binding action for her Tweet (X?) likes. She was appointed to the position in 2022.
Factoid
Did you know Michael Jackson once played an open air in Mauerpark? Well, next to it? He played the Friedrich-Ludwig-Jahn-Sportpark stadium in 1992. The stadium will be demolished later this summer after the Berlin Thunder’s 2024 season (American football) and rebuilt as a fully accessible stadium for an estimated €182 million, according to rbb24. The plan is to re-open near the end of 2027 but because Berlin is out of money, it will probably take longer. You don’t need to mourn the passing of the existing stadium — it was home to BFC Dynamo, the Stasi’s own soccer club back when East Germany was still a thing.
Germany-wide news
❓ A solid summary of the EU elections that end Sunday
🗳️ The far-left politician who started a right-wing party
🛂 The chancellor will increase deportations after attack
🔀 Some big and little changes in Germany this month
Postkutsche (reader mail)
We like hearing from our readers! Feel free to email or use the comment section below!
🚈Reader Aapeli on the cleanup in the U8:
”Drug users have not disappeared but moved elsewhere from the stations (as one with common sense could've guessed). Living at Moritzplatz, drug users have started constantly breaking into our apartment building, and are now shooting up in our basement, backyard, and stairwell.”
🗞️Reader Linda on an unintentionally sketchy headline:
“Was it necessary to specify ‘immigrant’ in ‘Immigrant sentenced to life for double murder in train’? Deutsche Welle mentions a man, and specifying that the person is not German is the kind of rhetoric that the (far)right wing uses to justify strict immigration policies or even deportation of migrants.”
🧹🪣Reader Patrick on the Ordnungsamt app:
”I have used it to report dangerous dogs in Plänterwald, illegally parked motorbikes outside my daughter’s Kita, damaged bike paths, and just recently Neo-nazi stickers that appeared near our house and a dangerously broken climbing apparatus in a playground which had sharp rusty bits of metal.”
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I look forward to your comments on the very last Formular needed to gain German citizenship. It is a ten page list of, Have you ever been a member of or have supported the following organizations? The very last on the list, after groups such as the Kurdish Communist Party, was Scientology.