#273: No more public transit strikes and the underperforming naturalization office

They aren't Nazi trash pandas

Hopefully this time with less death: About 2,000 plants will replace the 1,500 fish that lived in the Aquadom pre-accident. The hotel housing the aquarium-cum-terrarium will re-open by the end of the year. Photo: Union Investment

Hey 20 Percent!

I’m back in Berlin after three unplanned weeks in the States where I didn’t have to face a single surly grocery store checker because one of the things the States does right is self-checkout.

But I noticed something while waiting for my baggage at BER: Berlin is littered with help-wanted posters for major companies for what would seem attractive positions. And while German politicians are also crying about a lack of skilled workers and highlighting immigration as one solution, they don’t seem to be crying about the perpetual low wages or high financial and bureaucratic barriers to moving here.

Sure they updated immigration laws to make it easier to become German but they did little to make the process easier. Indeed, as you can read below, they instead essentially just opened a new checkout line, inviting everyone who hadn’t been waiting too long to rush over and get service before those who have been waiting months and years.

I’m going to start the process to gain dual citizenship soon and will detail my lack of progress here.

In other news: Please visit this issues’s sponsor Vivid below and, as always, if you want to support us directly, sign up for a paid subscription or contribute on our Patreon.

And, next Saturday (April 20) , I’m launching a new series of stand-up comedy shows featuring the funniest Berlin and touring English-language comedians in Umspannwerkost, a historic turn-of-the-century power station in Friedrichshain. I’ll host and they’ll tell the jokes in a unique theater reminiscent of this city’s cabaret-laden past. Tickets here!

Have a good weekend!

Andrew

BVG says no to strikes and scheduled service

Good news before the weird news: Public transport strikes in our fair city are now a thing of the future after BVG and union Verdi agreed on a new, three-year contract Thursday. Deutsche Bahn last month reached an agreement with one of its two unions, ending strikes on long-distance trains as well as Berlin’s S-Bahn, which is operated by Deutsche Bahn. The next labor talks that could affect our public transport are slated for next spring when Deutsche Bahn must once again face off against its other union, the EVG. So we’re safe — for now. The weird news: While announcing the labor agreement, BVG said it was also going to bin scheduled service on as-yet unnamed lines, and instead promote set intervals, according to Tagesspiegel. The idea is that, say, an M10 tram will come every five minutes (that’s about 1/4 of a Sterni) rather than at set times during peak hours — the public transport provider wants to prohibit trams and buses from crowding behind each other because of weather, traffic or driver whim.

The new, improved naturalization office isn’t

Berlin’s new centralized naturalization office is understaffed and overworked — like its predecessor offices — and is actually processing new digital applications ahead of older, paper-based applications, according to Nicolas, the maker of über Berlin guide All About Berlin. The new office near the Ausländerbehörde adopted a backlog of 40,000 cases (and has made nary a dent) and Berlin officials expect an additional 50,000 to arrive this year, he detailed in a Reddit post and on Twitter/X. The office wanted to hire 200 specialists before opening but later cut that goal to 175, which is irrelevant since it currently only has 99 employees not helping us to become German. Old applications are allegedly being hand-scanned by lower-level employees, a process that likely won’t be complete this year. Officials are now telling people to re-apply using the digital process and pay again — their duplicate processing fee will be refunded, according to Tia Hardy Robinson from relocation specialists Expath. Sigh.

Pro-Palestine Conference will be closely watched

Up to 2,500 police officers will guard — and surveil — the Palestine Conference this weekend in Tempelhof. The three-day event — titled “We accuse” — will include speakers and panels hoping to create a cease-fire in in the conflict between Israel and Hamas and increase humanitarian aid to Gaza. Organizers are also unhappy with Germany’s position in the conflict. Berlin mayor Kai Wegner called the event “unbearable” and pledged to prosecute any anti-semitic remarks made during the conference, according to the Morgenpost. Spontaneous demonstrations will also be dispersed.

Factoid

Just chilling at the defunct Spreepark. Photo: Conticium via Creative Commons.

The myth is that Hermann Göring (yes, that Göring) had a herd of raccoons, either in Brandenburg or the state of Hesse, and, on a whim, set them free and now Germany’s awash in North American trash pandas. The truth is that the former Nazi ruler had nothing to do with Germany’s raccoon plague. Instead, Wilhelm Sittich Freiherr von Berlepsch, the chief forester around the Edersee lake in Hesse, set two raccoon couples free on this day in 1934 and we now get to see them snacking on Döner late in the night, like most other Berliners. All German raccoons are reportedly genetically linked to the original couples.

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